"Mai Ling, do you understand? It's very hard to get into America. It will take a lot of luck and a lie, a paper lie, to get in. You are very important. You need to say the things I told you." From that moment on every part of me becomes stiff. I have never told a lie before. Ma Ma once taught me it was bad luck to lie and the evil spirits would punish me if I lie. I don't know how to lie. We're from Canton.

"My aunt's new name is Li Wah. She is 43 years old, I have six cousins, my grandmother's maiden name is Lee--no, it is Lau."

All these words are floating in my mind. Auntie makes me say them over and over again. I don't know what they mean! Auntie Ying grabs my hand and pulls me into a room. She silences my crying with her penetrating eyes. It is as if she casts a spell over me. Shivers go up and down my spine. I whisper, "Six cousins, Canton, Li Wah. . ."

Three men sit at a table a few yards in front of Auntie Ying and me. My Auntie hands them the papers. They are like dogs. One stands up and walks around us, sniffing and barking questions at Auntie and me. I don't know what he is saying. Another man is writing. His pen never stops moving. The third man speaks in two languages. It is strange that he doesn't look like Auntie or me, yet he speaks like us.

This meeting seems to be a game. They stare at me and try to read my mind. The questions are quite silly. I wonder how anyone can answer them. I think they are traps. As they raise their voices, I feel myself shrink. They are mean to Auntie Ying. I am afraid they will hurt me. The man walking in circles around us yells at me when I am too slow to answer a question. Do I lie? What about the evil spirits? Auntie says we will live on the streets if I do not lie, and I will not see my Ba Ba again. One by one, I speak words into the air, watching and waiting to see the dogs would catch them as if hungry for a bone, or it they would just let them fall to the ground. The evil spirits will punish me. I know they will, but I have no choice!

With every answer that departs from my mouth, I feel a part of me leave. Each question and answer between us inflicts me with pain. Despite my fear, there is this growing power that I possess that I cannot explain. I don't know if it is good or bad, but I sense that my Ma Ma, Gung Gung, and fellow travelers are with me and lifting me up.

The bombardment of questions comes to an end and the three men talk softly among themselves. Auntie Ying's hands shakes as she watches the man with the pen pick up one of the two stamps on the desk. He punches it on to our paper lies. "Cleared. You can go," he said with a vicious sneer. "Next!" I did not understand the word he said, but it was harsh, perhaps harsher than all the rest. Auntie Ying looks at me and leads me outside. As soon as we cross the threshold, we begin to cry. Tears of joy run down Auntie's cheeks. Tears of sadness run down mine. In that room, a part of me left, and something new has taken its place. It is anger. Anger because I am no longer the same girl. It isn't because of my lies. I don't care anymore if the spirits punish me. I don't think they will. They eyes of my heart are opened now by something I have never seen before. It is people treating other people like they have no worth. We are dirt, and now they are dogs. Every person that carries a dream into that room may not be as lucky as us but we will all share the same misfortune. We will be judged by the color of our hair and our skin, and then a part of each of us will die and be replaced by something ugly.

Auntie Ying lifts my chin and said, "Mai Ling, we have crossed the fire and we are not burned. Be happy. Our paper lies worked. You will see your father in America now, and your children will honor you for this." I remember the men's hatred and feel only sadness. The fire would be there on the "Gold Mountain".

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